My Baby is 1!

Oh, I cannot believe that Cobee is one!! Where does the time go?!? He is cuter than ever! He is getting so grabby and mobile!! Before Cobee, I would have been thinking "Great! He is going to be into everything! Let's slow him down!!!" But with Cobee, I am all for him getting into everything! That is how he will learn! (Yeah, give me another few months and we will see how I feel about this last statement!) In all seriousness, it is a celebration with each bit of progress that he makes. We just got him sitting up from his side to his bum. We have been working on this for a couple of months now, and he is finally doing it! He is getting on his hands and knees and rocking. YEAAA Cobee! It won't be long before he starts to crawl. He is soooooo cute and fun!! Who would have ever known? He is digging into his first birthday cake and loving every minute of it! It was funny because he would lunge into it and grab fist-fulls of CHOCOLATE cake and frosting and then look around until he found me to see if he was going to get in trouble, but when he saw me laughing, he knew it was okay and so he went in for more!

Mom, do I have Down syndrome?

Carter is so hillarious. He is getting so big and smart. He is starting to catch on to this whole "down syndrome" thing---so I thought. We have never made a big deal out of the down syndrome thing to our boys because we want them to think of Cobee as being exactly like them, which he is. We do not and will not treat him "differently". So we have never told the boys that he is different or "special". We tell the boys that THEY are special because they get to be Cobee's brother. So the other day Carter saw some pictures of children with Down syndrome and recognized that they had it which sparked a conversation and lots of questions about it. I asked him what he knew about kids with Down syndrome. He said, "I know that they are pretty cool kids." I was completely satisfied with that answer. The most important thing to know is simply that! And then he asked, "Mom, do I have Down syndrome?" I laughed to myself, but not out loud, "No, sweetie, you don't". Why would he think that? I thought he understood what Down syndrome is?!? "Did I have Down syndrome when I was a baby?" "No, you didn't" "Cuz, boy, Cobee sure looks a lot like me!!" I had to fight back tears, but he is right! Cobee does look a lot like him (both of which are very handsome!), and Carter is so proud of that! I want him to be proud of that forever! Knowing Carter and his ability to love and care for others, and especially the way he loves Cobee, he WILL be proud of that forever.

A great email

I got this email from the Special Olymics of Idaho. I wanted to share it. I love SCRUBS. This message is from the actor who plays Dr. Cox. He has a 10 year old (I think he is 10) named Max, who has Down syndrome. Who could look at this face and not feel bad about using the word "Retard" in a derogatory way?

Spread the Word to End the Word
A personal message from John C. McGinley

Hi, I'm John C. McGinley. I'm an ambassador for the National Down Syndrome Society, and today I'm teaming up with Special Olympics to bring you a message that's important to me.

So many times in life you are asked to change...
Change your clothes. Change lanes. Change jobs. Change the sheets. Change flights. Change your tune. Change horses midstream. Change your latitudes and your attitudes!
Change, and the ability to adapt, is to the human condition as air is to the lungs. We change, and in the doing, we thrive!
In fact, we just elected a president who promised, above all else, to "change."
What if, on March 31, you elected to change the way you use the words "retard" and "retarded"?
Hardly seems like the largest of sacrifices. Not when you consider the changes in language that you have, so willingly, already elected to integrate into your vernacular. You no longer use the words nigger, or kike, or faggot, or jap, or kraut, or mick, or wop.
Why would you? Why on earth would you? Those are all words that hurt. Those are all racial and ethnic slurs and epithets that perpetuate negative stigmas. They are painful! And that is not okay. It is wrong to pain people with your language. Especially, when you have already been made aware of your oral transgression's impact.
Make no mistake about it: WORDS DO HURT! And when you pepper your speak with "retard" and "retarded," you are spreading hurt. So stop it. Stop saying "retard" and "retarded." Those words suck! You are better than that and you definitely do not need to be "that guy."
There is no longer any acceptable occasion to lace your dialogue with the words "retard" and "retarded." Without fail, those words are the stuff of hurt. They, straight up, are. So, stop it! Stop using the "R-word."
The 7 million people with intellectual disabilities (around the planet) who are on the receiving end of this hate speak are genetically designed to love unconditionally. These "retards" are NEVER going to return your vitriol. Ever! So what could possibly be the up-side of continuing to use the "R-word" in your daily discourse?
We love you. We do!
And, just in case you missed it and you need an extra hug? We love you!
You do not need to love us in any kind of reciprocal fashion. You don't. (It's not that kind of bargain.)
But, how about on March 31, you elect to change? A word? Two stinkin' syllables?
On March 31, join us and "Spread the Word to End the Word." And the word is "retard!" It HURTS! So help us to cut it out.
Thank you! We do love you!
John C. McGinley

I should have known!!!

Pic of Cobee at 10 months old

I was at Target a couple of weeks ago to get a basketball hoop for Caden's birthday. It was really heavy and large, so I found an assosiate to get a flatbed to help me with it. But Before I asked this particular associate to help me, I passed by another associate named Brent, working his heart out trying to put away a shopping cart full of returns. I really would have asked him to help me, but he was busy-- the assosiate that I asked was not. I have seen Brent at Target before. He is about 30-35, I think, and just the sweetest thing. I am not sure what exactly his conditions are, but he is so much like a guy with Down syndrome, I wonder if he is. He just doesn't have the look as much. But he walks like it, talks like it, and definatetly has the attitude of one. So naturally, I thought, "He probably couldn't lift it on", and "would he be capable enough to help me?" So I, instead, asked the other associate to help me. He grudgingly called out on his walkie-talkie for someone to bring a flatbed from the back to help me. This associate, mind you, was not busy himself. Brent, on the other hand, over-heard our conversation, and immediately put down what he was doing, and came right over. "I can help you!" He said. I was a little skeptical , at first, but he came from the back pushing a flatbed, followed me right over to the sporting goods, helped me lift that huge, heavy box onto the flat bed and then pushed it all the way to the front of the store. It was difficult for him and it was hard for me not to tear up as he smiled and said "You have a good day!" after he had got me in line at the check-outstand. I wanted to give him a huge hug, which, I am sure, would have been invited by him. I should have known that the one to help me would have been him. It was much more difficult for him to help me, plus he was busy, unlike some of the others, yet he didn't see it that way, and he took the time to help ME! I should have known!

Where is your baby with Down syndrome?

Over the last couple of weeks, we have had several instances where someone will be looking right at Cobee and ask us where our baby with Down syndrome is. My brother got married a couple of weeks ago and one of the bride's maids, whom we have never met before, took Cobee to hold him and once she held him close to her, she was hooked. She held him for over an hour before someone else was able to pry him away from her. Later that night, she asked my brother, "I thought you said you had a baby nephew with Down syndrome. Where was he?" She was shocked at first when my brother told her that he was the baby that she had been holding all night. Then she said, "He was such an angel! I knew that there was something special about that baby. I should have put two and two together." It is so hard to look to the future and know what Cobee will be like. (For the most part). I find comfort in knowing that he is so normal right now, that in 6 years from now, it will still be normal. And in 20 years from now, it will still be normal. That is the only way that I can see it right now.

Sitting Up!

Yet another victory! Cobee is sitting up! He looks like such a little man. I don't like that he is growing up, but each new stage is so fun with him. We are all enjoying watching him grow. We all take our turns pushing him and encouraging him through each stage of devlopement. I often walk around the corner and find the other boys down on the ground with him, right in his face saying,"Use your arms, Cobee!"

LoVe is Unconditional

My boys have such a connection to Cobee. Love is much too shallow of a word to describe the way I feel for Cobee, and I think that I can speek for the rest of us when I say that. I have found a deeper meaning to life. I never, in a million years, thought that I could love my boys any more than I did, but I was wrong. Cobee has brought a deeper, more Christ-like love to our whole family. We speak softer and kinder, we have a more meaningful relationship with each other. Shane and my marriage has never been stronger. I can't explain it. All I know is that I love all of my boys so much more than ever before. I appreciate the little things more and I have whitnessed an unconditional love unfold from the walls in our home.